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PostPosted: Fri May 24, 2013 12:10 am 
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Hey everyone! :wave: Amazingly enough, I'm still awake (you have no idea how drained I am these days). :lol: I'm hoping the thread title explains itself. ;) And while this subject has been brought up in the forum somewhat recently, I thought I'd actually go ahead and start a thread since it's been on my mind again.

I've worked hard on getting healthier over the past 9 years or so (!) with varying degrees of success. There's so much confusion and misinformation out there that it can be overwhelming and outright difficult to know how to go about it. I've made some excellent progress in the past year though, and I'm hoping it'll mean a healthy pregnancy for me. :) So until little "enigmarey" arrives I'm pretty much on a maintenance break. :p I'm still going to eat healthy and exercise of course but I can't exactly try to lose weight at a time like this. But if all goes well I can get back on the wagon sometime next year.

People who know me in RL know that I've always struggled with my weight, but early last year I got completely derailed and my health went downhill after a ton of personal stress hit in the family. However, I reached a new breaking point that finally got me off my @$$: last year's miscarriage. :( I knew what I needed to do when it came to getting my priorities back in order again, I just needed to buckle down and make myself do it. I started by making sure to eat lots of fresh veggies and fruit, cutting out most added sugar and other simple carbs, and watching my overall portion sizes. I worked my way through a blindness scare (I have incredibly weak and damaged eyes) while finding out I'd been an undiagnosed type 2 diabetic for over ten years (part of the reason why my eyes are so damaged). I've also been working through a lifetime case of GAD that I have only been recently made aware of (a long story in and of itself). I used to be a smoker and a binge-drinker on top of everything else, but I've been free of both issues for six years now. :)

I'm currently in the best shape of my life thanks to all my hard work though; earlier this year I took up jogging and actually started training in hopes of running my first 5K early this month. And yay, I found out last month that I finally got pregnant again! :D My current condition dictates I take up less strenuous exercise so this month's 5K didn't quite work out, but I'm anxious to return to training for it when everything goes back to normal. I never thought I'd actually like running, let alone miss it! :lol: Right now I've swapped it out for swimming and other low-impact exercise.

Anyway, I've lost about 60 pounds since March of 2012, making my grand total of exactly 150 pounds lost (OMG, that's a whole person)! :shifty: I actually won a statewide award for it through a non-profit organization this past month. I create and host programs covering healthy weight loss ideas for them and do a fair amount of motivational speaking, and in a way I think doing so helps me continue onward. What boggles my mind the most though is that I'm still not done! :o :lol:

So does anyone else have any health journey stories that they'd like to share? Or maybe some of you would like to vent about how hard it can be to shake off bad habits for good (I do know from experience after all) or perhaps you need to find a reason on getting started on positive changes? Or it could be that you're lucky enough to have never had to worry about your health at all. Given that both of my parents became diabetic and that I lost them to cancer far too soon, I do worry a lot. :( I'm so lucky that I'm finally in a supportive environment and I was able to work past the diabetes on my own (my current diet and activity level has gotten my blood sugar under control without any medication). :)

I think I actually am going to head off to bed now. :zzz: Rest is important too, you know. ;) For the moment I'll leave you with some very zen words from Fushigi Yuugi: "A good soul needs a good body to live in. Take care of yourself." Any supportive responses and/or discussions are welcome. :)

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PostPosted: Sat May 25, 2013 7:02 am 
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Great idea!!

It's good to hear you making positive changes. I'm trying to do so myself as well at the moment, but it's difficult. I will say that I'm losing weight at the moment due to the fact that I have a job that I love right now after being unemployed for 6 months. It was quite stressful as a recent graduate to have a University degree and not be able to find work in this horrible economy. So while I had all the time to work out and eat healthy, the stress of that situation got the better of me. But now that I have structure back in my life I'm finding it easier to eat healthy.

Moral of the story I guess is structure. I've always had difficulty with it. Staying up too late, skipping breakfast etc. I know that when I have that under control, the healthier habits come naturally. When I'm moving closer to where I work in july I'm probably going to get back into exercising. Which is bound to give me much needed energy.

Although I must mention, I'm not actually overweight and never have been. At least not in any medical way. I prefer to call it horribly out of shape. :)

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PostPosted: Mon May 27, 2013 9:42 am 
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I'm not sure if I have a cold or an allergy attack right now but it sucks! Esp on a holiday weekend. :angry:

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PostPosted: Mon May 27, 2013 6:37 pm 
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Great thread idea, and congratulations on your improving health! :up:

I have never been considerably overweight, though I did get somewhat plump at times in the past. However, when I lived in France (circa 2010/11), I really started to change my diet (basically regulating it more and not snacking in between meals) and to do more exercise than I used to. Since then, I've managed to maintain a healthy weight and tone, even if I wouldn't describe my body as athletic (though I may start working on that ;)).

There is also something I'm going to address here that I never have before, mainly due to the prejudices surrounding mental health: depression. I've had depression in the past (nothing more than what can be described as mild or moderate depression, but depression nonetheless). In many of my past bouts, I simply swept it under the rug and got on with life as best as I could, but a strong bout of it earlier this year led me to run straight to a doctor. I have started medication to counteract it and it's been doing wonders for me. In fact, I think it helped with my recent coming out. :) I would definitely recommend anyone who has the slightest fear that they may indeed be depressed to go and see a doctor. You may be "getting by" (as I was), but life is too short to feel constantly miserable.

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PostPosted: Fri Jun 21, 2013 6:32 pm 
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PatrickvD - I used to struggle so much with structure in my life, and at times I still do. I've found that I need to actively create structure, which can be extremely difficult when you're no longer in school and you're not working a regular job (as is my case). And stress, oh stress . . . managing it can be the downfall of anyone. There have been times when I really felt I was going to snap! And you're truly lucky in that you've only been out of shape and not overweight, being where you're at gives you a head start at actually getting in shape . . . I may be in the best shape of my life right now but I still have a long way to go. ;)

Maerj - Oh, allergies suck! :( Luckily mine have gotten better over the years, but part of that might be because I moved to the desert. :D

Wondy - I think depression is probably one of the most misunderstood illnesses out there. I was diagnosed with it shortly after losing my mom, and as I went through therapy I got a lot of grief from friends over supposedly pretending to be sad for the attention. Many seem to think it's either an imaginary illness or that it's easy to just smile and get over it. Regardless, you're absolutely right in that life is too short to feel constantly miserable, and there's really no shame in seeking help. It's just too bad that prejudices and poor judgments do exist. I'm glad you've gotten the help you need and that it helped with your coming out. :)

* * *

My pregnancy's going smoothly so far, but given my medical past I was concerned about some very likely odds of developing gestational diabetes (pregnant women often become diabetic even if they have no history of it, and the odds are almost certain if they do have a history). I pushed for early glucose screenings and got a little worried when my first test read 30 points too high. :| So they had me go on a special 3-day sugar-rush diet in order to prepare for a 3-hour glucose fasting test. :biting: I hadn't felt so horrible in ages after eating all that crap, which became a pretty good reminder of why I eat healthier these days. I didn't have high hopes for good test results, especially after getting so wired and spacey from drinking the glucose that morning, but everything came back within a normal range! I'm really proud that I've worked so hard in the past year and can continue to manage my blood sugar without meds. :woot:

I'm past the danger zone of the first trimester, a big milestone after what I went through last year. I got to hear the baby's teeny, super-fast little heartbeat when I attended my first centering class and immediately pictured a hummingbird (a little silly, I know). :) I won't get my first ultrasound until next month, and I'm hoping the baby won't be too "shy" to reveal its gender at that time. :lol: Oh, and I'm also starting to show! :o :lol: I'm still getting aqua fitness in several times a week, which helps make up for the jogging I can no longer do. I'd like to get more walking in as well, but we've already hit 110º F over here and summer's just begun! :o I do head to the mall sometimes though to get some indoor walking (and shopping!) in. :D

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 1:25 am 
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I've lost 45 pounds since April. Though I haven't been exercising outside lately or walking down the road, because I get too hot. I seem to have a heat tolerance. I think a day when it's 55 and sunny feels great. If I'm in the heat for more than 15 minutes I begin to get sick and pass out. My house is usually at 65 degrees on the central air conditioner for the whole house. I feel like that scene in Batman and Robin where Mr. Freeze is in jail and tries to walk out of his cold cell, he begins to pass out. That's me in a nutshell for the best way to visualize it.

I've been drinking tons and tons of water which is important, but I'm still puzzled on how I lost 45 pounds since April

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 6:25 pm 
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enigmawing wrote:
I think depression is probably one of the most misunderstood illnesses out there. I was diagnosed with it shortly after losing my mom, and as I went through therapy I got a lot of grief from friends over supposedly pretending to be sad for the attention. Many seem to think it's either an imaginary illness or that it's easy to just smile and get over it.


That's horrible. It seems as though there's abundant ignorance regarding depression - it isn't simply feeling a little sad. It's certainly not something controllable by mere will. It may not always have a clear or obvious cause either, and can be attributed to genetics.

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 22, 2013 7:10 pm 
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enigmawing wrote:
I think depression is probably one of the most misunderstood illnesses out there. I was diagnosed with it shortly after losing my mom, and as I went through therapy I got a lot of grief from friends over supposedly pretending to be sad for the attention. Many seem to think it's either an imaginary illness or that it's easy to just smile and get over it.


I agree. Some people say just get over it, and it's all in your head kinda attitudes which I hate. I agree with you 110% on this. What's sad is some people who have depression are told that it's in their head believe it and their life can go to heck because of it.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 12:33 am 
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Yeah it's really hrd to make positive changes. I've been on weight watchers, trying to excercise, and eating more fruits and vegetables. It's all a struggle.

Dr Frankenollie wrote:
enigmawing wrote:
I think depression is probably one of the most misunderstood illnesses out there. I was diagnosed with it shortly after losing my mom, and as I went through therapy I got a lot of grief from friends over supposedly pretending to be sad for the attention. Many seem to think it's either an imaginary illness or that it's easy to just smile and get over it.


That's horrible. It seems as though there's abundant ignorance regarding depression - it isn't simply feeling a little sad. It's certainly not something controllable by mere will. It may not always have a clear or obvious cause either, and can be attributed to genetics.


Oh god, I can only imagine how horrible it would be if it were a genetic issue.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 27, 2013 9:57 am 
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I've recently quit drinking soda and other sugary drinks (again!), and hope to stay off it for good. I used to use the excuse of "staying awake" when it came to drinking soda, but later realize that after a while, it ends up making no difference as I still have afternoon tiredness.

The temptation never goes away, as I am always tempted to go to the nearest 7-Eleven, and buy a Big Gulp. Especially during the summer months, when I normally enjoy sipping on it as a relaxing way to cool off a little, on a very hot day. And it tastes a lot better than water.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 27, 2013 11:06 am 
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Walter wrote:
I've recently quit drinking soda and other sugary drinks (again!), and hope to stay off it for good. I used to use the excuse of "staying awake" when it came to drinking soda, but later realize that after a while, it ends up making no difference as I still have afternoon tiredness.

The temptation never goes away, as I am always tempted to go to the nearest 7-Eleven, and buy a Big Gulp. Especially during the summer months, when I normally enjoy sipping on it as a relaxing way to cool off a little, on a very hot day. And it tastes a lot better than water.


Welcome Back Walter. I don't think any of us have seen you for quite some time

I've pretty much given up sugary drinks. I drink Diet Soda now though I'm increasing my water intake a lot. I've also been sticking to serving sizes and eating fruit like Watermelon.

Probably I started drinking water for the first time on a regular basis back when I had that blood sugar scare of over 600. Although my primary doesn't think it was me eating that did it all the way to get that high. He has a suspicion that my epidurals in my spine the past few months may have jump started it. However I still need to treat it like diabetes. Before April I NEVER Drank water at all on a regular basis or probably any basis whatsoever. I used to complain that water was disgusting, but now I'm realizing it's not bad and is actually good. I'm probably drinking 8 glasses a day and because of that I've lost 40 pounds since April along with eating less and sticking to serving sizes.

When I was at my girlfriends house back in 2011 she use to tell me to drink more water and less soda. However fast forward to today and now it's the other way around. Funny how things change.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 27, 2013 3:09 pm 
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disneyboy20022 wrote:
Walter wrote:
Before April I NEVER Drank water at all on a regular basis or probably any basis whatsoever. I used to complain that water was disgusting, but now I'm realizing it's not bad and is actually good. I'm probably drinking 8 glasses a day and because of that I've lost 40 pounds since April along with eating less and sticking to serving sizes.


Congrats, good job. Hope you keep it up.

And water is the most delicious thing in the world. Everyone needs it. Everyday. :)

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 27, 2013 4:13 pm 
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Anyone have any experience with the Primal Blueprint/Paleo "lifestyle"? I'm thinking about trying it out.


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 28, 2013 2:14 pm 
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disneyboy20022 wrote:
Walter wrote:
I've recently quit drinking soda and other sugary drinks (again!), and hope to stay off it for good. I used to use the excuse of "staying awake" when it came to drinking soda, but later realize that after a while, it ends up making no difference as I still have afternoon tiredness.

The temptation never goes away, as I am always tempted to go to the nearest 7-Eleven, and buy a Big Gulp. Especially during the summer months, when I normally enjoy sipping on it as a relaxing way to cool off a little, on a very hot day. And it tastes a lot better than water.


Welcome Back Walter. I don't think any of us have seen you for quite some time

I've pretty much given up sugary drinks. I drink Diet Soda now though I'm increasing my water intake a lot. I've also been sticking to serving sizes and eating fruit like Watermelon.

Probably I started drinking water for the first time on a regular basis back when I had that blood sugar scare of over 600. Although my primary doesn't think it was me eating that did it all the way to get that high. He has a suspicion that my epidurals in my spine the past few months may have jump started it. However I still need to treat it like diabetes. Before April I NEVER Drank water at all on a regular basis or probably any basis whatsoever. I used to complain that water was disgusting, but now I'm realizing it's not bad and is actually good. I'm probably drinking 8 glasses a day and because of that I've lost 40 pounds since April along with eating less and sticking to serving sizes.


Thanks disneyboy! Yeah, I tend to be away for some time, and sometimes, I'll just lurk on these boards.

It was the same way with me, never drinking water for a long time, even though I was told constantly that I need to drink it everyday. I drank a lot of soda everyday, even to a point where my co-workers noticed and later told me after I stopped, that they were worried for me that I was drinking such an unhealthy drink. Since 2007, I have tried to quit a few times, only to fall off the wagon a few months later, and drink soda daily for a long time after that.

Now, I drink mainly water, and will drink grape juice if I am eating dinner at home. And I mainly drink from water fountains if I am at work, where the water tastes good enough to drink, and it helps me to save some money.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 30, 2013 12:50 pm 
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How are all of you getting on (enigma, disneyboy, ajmrowland, walter (Hi!))? There haven't been any posts since June.

Personally, I think I will soon be embarking on a weight loss program, but this time I'm not doing it on my own. I'm 6 feet 4 inches tall, and weigh about 140 kilos, which makes me obese. I think I need to lose at least 40 of those kilos.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 30, 2013 3:56 pm 
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Jules wrote:
How are all of you getting on (enigma, disneyboy, ajmrowland, walter (Hi!))? There haven't been any posts since June.
.


Well last month I had to start insulin. My doctor said that my triglycerides were in the 1200 range and my blood sugar accroding to the hemoglobin A1C blood test. The doctor said that his thoughts are I might have a metabolic disease. I've scaled back a lot on eating junk food mostly and the insulin is in this pen so I don't have to draw vials of it. Thanks to it my blood sugars have went to 280 to 140. Also I've lost 60 pounds sine April. I'm going to have more blood work in October

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PostPosted: Sun Sep 01, 2013 6:07 am 
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Hang in there!


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 04, 2013 11:54 am 
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Ah, I didn't mean to neglect this thread, but between the pregnancy and the heat of this summer I've been especially exhausted. Thank goodness it's finally starting to cool down! We were hitting 110º-118ºF regularly for a while and I feel lucky we rarely top 102º these days. Things should cool down nicely in another month or so. :)

I've heard good things about Paleo but I'm not sure if I could be that strict. It's a solid concept to follow (even if I don't personally agree with the grains aspect of it), and it's definitely a positive anytime you can avoid eating processed foods. Unfortunately, I'm rather lazy when it comes to that stuff, but the main part of my diet definitely consists of fresh produce, meat, nuts, and dairy anyway, and I'm sure mostly avoiding processed foods is something that has helped my health immensely. I'm not willing to give up grains though (while I understand why some do), but I do keep them mostly whole which I think makes a difference. I also can't help but occasionally dig into the likes of fast food or other areas of convenience, but I pretty much remain careful with my choices and try not to go overboard with anything.

I'm currently approaching the beginning of my third trimester. I'm still hitting the pool but have also started using equipment at the gym. I've discovered walking a fast treadmill for half an hour is almost as satisfying as the jogging I'd been doing. We've been looking over jogging strollers so I have a means to get active with the baby once I'm healed up, and Rey's mom has already offered to babysit anytime I want to hit the gym. I keep everything low-impact and can't push myself until sometime after the baby arrives, of course. It's a little frustrating to feel held back but it's all for a good cause. It's too early to know but here's to hoping I won't have to have a cesarean!

I am starving all the freaking time. It's so annoying! :lol: The temporary gain I'm going through is a little depressing, even though it's obviously necessary. I'm keeping it in check so far though and within the range my doctor and nurses have specified, but given the rate I've been at I'll have to be extra careful not to overdo anything in the next few months. I've been eating a lot of fruit and veggies, but have probably been indulging with desserts and treats more than I should lately. :| Just this past week I made the decision to cut out all the added sugars I've been increasingly splurging on in the past month, so I'm hoping that will help with the cravings and keep the continued potential risk for gestational diabetes on the low side. The whole shift in focus has been difficult for me. I still obviously need to do what's healthy, but it's been weirding me out to have to eat the extra thousand calories a day. :o I really should enjoy it, but it's been my excuse to indulge in things I haven't even looked at in the past year.

I've had two ultrasound sessions and will get another one in November. I'm showing pretty well now and bought my first pair of maternity jeans just this past week (so I can finally wear jeans again)! And I'm glad I didn't throw out all of my old shirts that had gotten too big since they're coming in handy again. :lol: I've become a little obsessed with shopping at thrift stores lately; I won't be pregnant forever so I refuse to spend a lot of money on clothes that are only going to be temporary. At the same time, it's annoying that the smaller clothes I'd bought earlier this year will no longer fit around my stomach; I have a Jack Skellington shirt I never even had the chance to wear! :p Oh well, perhaps sometime early next year?

Once again, I'm just exhausted. The baby must be stealing all my energy! :p I'm having a smoothie for breakfast and will probably spend the rest of the morning trying to talk myself into going to the gym. Maybe I'll go out for lunch later on, hit a few stores, and then hit the gym on the way home. I've been feeling restless lately and I imagine that's only going to get worse as December approaches, so I should take advantage of my abled body while I can. :frog:

Hope everyone is doing well! :wave:

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 01, 2015 2:58 pm 
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I've been overweight most of my life, certainly since kindergarten. It's been a problem, but I never dwelled on it too much, and people were kind enough to me in school that I was rarely teased about my weight or made to feel especially different for it. It's always been there in the back of my mind, but since I started college I noticed I was eating a lot more than usual. Usually, even though I was fat, I could take some pride in not being "fat-because-I-go-to-McDonald's-every day" fat or because I ate lots of cookies and cakes and candy bars. It sounds silly to make distinctions like that, but it helped me at the time to feel better about my body. I was fat, I think, because I ate my family's Southern cooking indiscriminately and spent most of my freetime engaged in non-physical activities, like posting to Disney message boards. Lol Well, when my already-tight-when-I-bought-it-for-Graduation belt was cutting into my skin and when I started losing sleep at night because I was afraid I'd have a heart attack and die in my bed (I probably have anxiety issues, too...), I decided I needed a change.

I had heard about calorie counting, but I didn't really understand what it meant or how to implement it into my life, so I did a little research and decided I'd try it on January 1st of this year. In that time, I've comfortably gone down a belt hole, and I feel much better about myself. With cutting down calories to 2,000 a day and walking 10,000 steps a day, I assumed I had lost 15-20 pounds or so. I haven't weighed myself until today, thanks to a deep set anxiety regarding scales and chastising pediatricians, but I knew I needed to know my actual weight so I could set my calories goals accurately as I continued with my loss. The scale read 305 pounds. I haven't weighed myself since freshman year for a high school gym physical, and then I was shocked (and embarrassed) to see 300 pounds. I've used that number for my standard weight for forms and stuff over the past five years, but I had a suspicion I was actually well over that weight.

So when I saw 305 on the scale, I was so excited. In a month or so, I will likely weigh less than I ever did in high school. Maybe in a year or a little more, I can actually be at a healthy BMI. For the first time in my life. Wow. All because I learned how simple it was to put my life in my own hands. A part of me wishes I'd come to that understanding before the stretch marks, but hey, what the hell. Honestly, I wasn't ready until January 1st, 2015 and I know I won't have a picture perfect body regardless of whether I reach my BMI, but I'm okay with that, too.

I know I have a long road ahead of me, but I'm determined not to quit. I've done really well so far, and I hope I can keep it up, and then turn that into a long-lasting matinence. The only people in real life who know I've been losing weight are my immediate family; I've been waiting to start telling friends until I felt ready-- maybe when I get past that 300? But I'm too excited not to share with anyone, and I always wished I'd contributed to this thread, but back in 2013 I was too insecure about my weight. So, anyway, here I am! And YAY!

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 25, 2015 1:09 pm 
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Thank you so much for bumping this thresd, UmbrellaFish! :wave: And it sounds like you've got a good grip on this; the commitment it takes to get healthier is definitely worth it.. :) I can understand the apprehension of participating, but I'm glad you're here now. People are so often shamed for it, even though there's nothing to be ashamed of. I'm cheering for ya!

***

It's amusing for me to read my old posts in this thread, as things have completely changed for me since then!

About a month after my son was born, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. Given how I was acting and feeling, it was a relief; that meant I was going to get help. My OBGYN put me on medication right away and scheduled me with a therapist and psychiatrist. And in the following months, I was diagnosed with GAD (which I'd long suspected) and OCD (which surprised me). During all this I pushed myself with my training and ran my very first 5k. No walking, all running. I was so proud of myself! Right around then I got to my lowest adult weight ever, 203, which was twelve pounds under my pre-pregnancy weight! I was so, so close to reaching the next BMI category. But I started running out of steam as I began to focus on my mental health, which was pretty taxing.

I've found it difficult to talk at times, but at my worst my anxieties were so bad I became agoraphobic; I wasn't able to leave the house on my own, not even out to the sidewalk to get the mail. Driving was especially difficult at times. I was constantly filled with dread, and anything sudden or unexpected would send me into a panic attack, even something as simple as the phone ringing or someone knocking on the door. Imagine living in constant fear that anything you do has horrible repercussions; this was my existence for months and even years on end. Living in this state actually goes back well into my childhood, and many of the events I experienced growing up and beyond amounted into a "perfect storm" of anxieties.

Actually, think Elsa. :p And funny enough, when we were seeing Frozen for the first time there at the theater, I had not been diagnosed with any of this and I found myself gasping, knowing very well how Elsa was trying so hard to overcome her issues just long enough to get through that coronation without losing it. I knew what it was like to always be on the verge of losing it. And before the film ended, I went into labor!

My fears and anxieties are why I ended up hiding behind an online persona in the past. And healing is why I changed my handle and finally started associating my artwork and posts with my real name, Karen. :)

Unfortunately, as I worked through these issues in the heat of summer, it was just too difficult to keep running or even walking (it was often still over 100 degrees well after sunset). And with my OCD getting better, it actually made it much more difficult to stick with my health goals. I had trouble making myself care enough to work for it, especially when I had to swap my weekly weight loss meetings for a weekly group session. I was diagnosed with depression mid-summer, and by the end of last year I gained back 40 pounds. :(

But fear not! With a healthier, more balanced state of mind along with further treatment I started a new regiment in January, reminding myself that I have to be a healthy mom for my little guy. And unfortunately, I got some kind of lung infection (which has triggered my asthma). I've been sick since mid-December, but it didn't get really bad until February. I'm still sick now, but feel like I may be able to join the human race again soon as I'm slowly improving. I've lost over ten pounds this year; not as much as I'd hoped for at this point, but not bad considering I've had days I can barely get out of bed. I have to start from square one again to getting running, but I'm ready to start training again once my lungs clear up. In the meantime I'm trying to get more walking in, but I'm nowhere near the level I was at last year.

Regardless, I'm thankful I'm not always so terrified anymore. I feel like I can handle anything thrown at me consciously and rationally instead of being constantly overwhelmed and wanting to curl up into a little ball. It's awesome (yet strange to me!) that I don't cry over every little thing; I mean, even way back in grade school I was labelled a crybaby. I wish I had been diagnosed with GAD and OCD back then; every little aspect of my life has gotten better since I've gotten treatment. It makes me all the more sympathetic to those with mental health issues and even more angry about all the stigmas that surround it.

My baby is already 15 months old, running around like crazy. It's a lot of work just to keep up with him, lol. But I love him like crazy. :) I need to make sure I'm a healthy, active mommy, and I'm hoping I have a good grip on getting there once again.

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